Hell on Heels

Not much going on in fashion these days...people are getting fired, nobody is shopping, my Christmas bonus consisted of a lunch box with the company logo embroidered on it, etc...

On to bigger and better things. I went to an engagement party last night where a very drunk best man kept asking me about my shoes. This is how the conversation went...

"Why do girls wear heels?"

"Because they're pretty."

"Are those jingle bells on your shoes?"

"No."

"Can you take them off so I can see them?"

"No."

"I bet you're really short without those shoes."

"Please go away."

"You're one hot chick, can I have your number?"

"Again...please go away."


I am so not kidding. Drunk guy brought up a good point though. Why do we wear painful shoes? Most of what we do/wear is in order to gain attention from somebody. To look professional so your boss respects you, to look attractive so the boy hits on you, to look hideous so the drunk best man will leave you alone.... I wear heels at work every day to feel empowered. I'm 5'1" and I need all the help I can get. I also wear heels because it's fashion. Shoes and bags are my vices and I cannot live without the best of both.

Example.... During my employee discount days at work, I bought my new favorite shoes. They're Calvin Klein, black leather, sooo fun...and literally hell on wheels...I'm talking the devil invented these shoes to torture my poor sad feet.

I wore these shoes to work one day and then our VP informed us that we needed to go to our flagship store and re-merchandise the floor. I stood in these shoes from 4:00 to 8:00 at night and by the end of it...I was cursing Warnaco for buying Calvin Klein and firing all of the good designers who probably made comfy shoes at one point in time. Drunk guy did have one inspiring thing to say..."Why don't you come up with some fancy technology to make heels more comfortable, that could make you a kajillionaire." Now we know who I have to thank when I'm counting my kajillions.

A Change is Gonna Come

Times are a-changin' peeps. History has been made tonight and for those of you who didn't vote for Obama, maybe the life-altering fact that an African American was finally able to win the presidency in the year 2008 can comfort you. Thank you America for finally evolving!

On that note...there are still a few other results I'm anticipating...

I'm waiting to see if California voted NO on Proposition 8 because equal rights for all citizens is incredibly important in this country and that includes the right to marry.

In my very own state, there is a proposition out there called Act 1 that would prohibit "unmarried couples" from adopting or fostering children together. Apparently this is in an effort to keep cohabitating but "unmarried" gay couples from adopting children together....it would also prevent them from providing a safe home for one of the 4000 foster children currently living in Arkansas. Unbelievable.

Come on America...let's not take one step forward in electing Obama and two steps back in limiting the rights of certain American citizens. Don't disappoint me now!

Witch or Sexy Kitten?

Halloween is an interesting time...there's alot of pressure revolving around the type of costume you choose. One of my favorite scenes from the "Sex and the City" movie takes place at a Duane Reade when Miranda is looking for a Halloween costume for herself....

Miranda: "Witch and sexy kitten...the only two choices for women are witch or sexy kitten."
Carrie: "You just said a mouthful there sister."

It's true that for some reason, women are notoriously more unclothed on Halloween and I find that alot of men expect that. My favorite costume I've ever had (besides Butterbear when I was 2) was when we dressed up as the "Breakfast Club" and I played Molly Ringwald's character. I think I was a junior in college and let me tell you, the college boys were not impressed. Why were my legs covered? And what was with my wig? The next year was "Boogie Nights" which was deemed more accetable thanks to my Rollergirl attempt although...I had a mild concussion for two days after thanks to my fancy skates.

This year was different because there was an actual event occurring on the date of Halloween. More pressure.....and while I don't think my costume was the best (Todd & Margot kicked it out of the water), I do think I did Jessica Simpson justice. I must say, that long blonde wig was incredibly uncomfortable and while certain family members think my hair should always look like that...they can forget it. Get used to me as a redhead people because it's not changing. Anyway...I admit that I did fall into the Halloween stereotype of revealing clothing because what's a Jessica Simpson costume if it involves full coverage? This didn't seem to bother anyone until one guest on the party bus commented that the reason I was cold was because I wasn't wearing any pants. Have you seen Jessica Simpson lately? You're lucky I even wore a shirt!

Anyway, best Halloween ever, great party, awesome wedding. Way to get married Laura & Cody!

If you haven't voted yet.....don't forget to make your way to the polls tomorrow. Unless of course you're voting Republican in which case you can take a long detour and get lost along the way.